Over the past fifty plus years that I have been alive I've had many occasions to watch friends and loved ones marry. There are more than a few things I have learned about weddings because of this of all this, but adhering to some of the most typical superstitions and traditions associated with weddings are the most important. Why? Since it just therefore happens that many of those who thought we would ignore these seemingly non-sensical and sometimes nearly comical steps to access the alter have often paid a higher price because of their disrespect of the long standing customs.
The Wedding Dress
We have all heard that it's misfortune for the groom to see bride-to-be in her wedding dress before the ceremony. The simple truth is a longer standing custom says that it's misfortune for the bride-to-be to wear the entire wedding outfit prior to the time that she will take her wedding vows. This is why you nearly never see a bride trying on a marriage dress with her wedding sneakers, veil and so on. A female college friend of mine understood a girl who decided to ignore that tradition and display her total wedding clothing to her bridal party for the purpose of having "some photos used with her friends" the night time before her wedding. Therefore she said, the majority of those present think she was showing off just. The outfit seemed unusually tight to some who saw the bride all decked out that night time and soon gossiping tongues spread the news headlines quickly.
The very next day the groom didn't show up for the ceremony after my college friend said that she called and told him that his bride appeared "fat or pregnant" when she saw the bride in her outfit the night before. My friend was not being indicate, but she felt sorry for the groom who had opted out of his method to keep his bride pure (she experienced claimed to be a virgin) by abstaining from sex with her. He previously never seen her in the wedding dress, but also his sister stated that she noticed an unusually rapid pounds gain in the bride-to-be who was simply not one recognized to fluctuate in her pounds or overeat. There could have been a complete lot more to the story than that, but I have without doubt that the catalyst for the groom's cancellation was that phone call from my pal and the call would never had been produced if the bride was not revealing and scoffing at a long-standing tradition.
The Wedding Shoes
Both bride and groom should know that the superstitious in our midst say it is unlucky to wear any shoes for the ceremony that aren't to be used particularly and only for the wedding. They claim that additionally it is misfortune to wear the sneakers before the full day of the ceremony, or to ever put them on again after the bride and groom take their vows. The shoes should be ripped apart or burned sometime shortly after the ceremony rather than given away to anyone else. This tradition started sometime in the late 1800s and probably came from merchants eager to sell shoes. However, there may be some truth to it.
A pal of mine reports a neighborhood friend of his who got married about two decades ago had some very bad luck as a result of ignoring this odd superstition. Ben was a thrifty man who hated wasting cash. Sometime in the year before he was married he previously purchased an expensive pair of shoes to use for weddings, funerals and additional special occasions. When my friend went with him to help choose an clothing for his own wedding ceremony, he asked Ben about shoes or boots. Ben informed him that he was going to wear his best pair of shoes because they had barely been worn and had been like new. After all, even back after that a new pair of quality shoes could easily cost over $ 100 and Ben experienced that money would be better spent elsewhere.
My pal told Ben approximately the marriage tradition regarding shoes that he had heard about from his mom, father and grandparents. My pal took the tips himself, got married without incident and has remained married since. Admittedly, he and his family members are extremely superstitious about things like weddings, but there were few divorces in his family line and several successful marriages and weddings. Ben wore his "greatest footwear" on the day of the marriage despite the warning he received from my friend. Amazingly, his bride had her own exclusive plan for wedding footwear. She decided to use sneakers for the marriage as some sort of joke concerning say that she might be a runaway bride. The joke backfired.
Ben and his family were highly insulted by the existence of the sneakers and a disagreement began during the wedding ceremony reception which continued throughout the honeymoon and for weeks afterward. Things really found a head when family members on both sides viewed the wedding photos. The photographer became fixated on the bride's sneakers and held capturing featuring them. Most of the guests were captured displaying a scowl on their face as they spoke to the bride and stared down at the sneakers. The few broke up and divorced within 90 days of their wedding. I say that we should add putting on sneakers to a marriage to the misfortune list for wedding footwear, apparel and choices.
Placing a coin (specifically a silver dollar) in one of your wedding boots or shoes is considered extremely good luck. Although this pertains to the bride mainly, I suppose that the groom provides nil to lose by attempting it as well. This tradition goes back to the "Something Old, Something New, Something Borrowed, Something Blue, A Sixpence in your Shoe" wedding superstition from previous England. Relatives and close friends would supply the bride small tokens of their affection to wear or bring with her on her special day. These items were presented before the wedding started and were not wedding gifts just, simply mementos to remind the bride-to-be that she has friends and family that care about her and support her decision to marry.
Something Old was usually a token carried by another bride at an earlier wedding who has had good luck or an effective and happy marriage. This gift is about sending the previous bride's all the best and fortune to the present one. Something New is supposed to impart all the best to the bride giving her hope and confidence for the future. Something Borrowed is thought to represent happiness that is imparted to the bride-to-be from her friends and family. Any happiness that they have experienced they offer to mortgage to the bride while she makes her personal happy remembrances. Something Blue is given with the expectation that the bride's marriage will be filled up with an honest and pure love, along with fidelity. A Sixpence (Coin) In Your Shoe is said to impart a financial blessing on the marriage. Few brides dare to ignore this tradition which many consider the most important of all. I understand one that did.
She insisted on a wedding service with included her simply, the groom and a clergyman. The majority of the bride's family and friends, and also those of the groom, were against the relationship due to a huge age difference between your bride (who was simply very youthful) and the groom (who was simply thirty five years older). Most of the groom's family members thought she was a precious metal digger because he previously a substantial fortune and his family was popular in the city where they lived. However, the bride also originated from money, nonetheless it was new money. Sadly, I believe her decision to marry this man really had more regarding the actual fact that she may have wanted to enjoy the position of being married into a family members with a major standing in society than real love. In any case, she made a decision to punish all of the nay sayers who were against the marriage and prove them incorrect by insisting that her wedding be in a public park with no guests. The couple spent the money a huge wedding would have cost on an elaborate honeymoon.
That bride broke almost all the rules of tradition and superstition involving weddings. This included the tradition of bringing tokens to her wedding given to her by a friend who thought the age difference matter was no big offer. That friend could not attend the ceremony whether or not she was invited or not really because she was living in another country at that time, but she hoped that the tokens would bring the couple all the best. And they may have done their job if those items have been brought to the small ceremony by the bride. They were not really. Despite what seemed like a marriage filled up with bliss during and just after the honeymoon, the couple divorced after just five years citing irreconcilable differences.
The Wedding Rings
It is considered extremely unlucky to go shopping for a wedding ring on a Friday because that is a tradition Sale Day and an extremely discounted ring collection is considered bad luck overall. It is a lot more unlucky to wear a wedding ring (apart from trying it on) for any length of time before the ceremony. I understand of at least twelve occasions where either the bride-to-be or groom wore their ring (for whatever reasons) all night or days before the wedding and could not really for the life of them remove it. This not only caused physical and emotional discomfit, but ultimately ended up in arguments that broke up four of those couples before the full day of their weddings. There could have already been a million various other known reasons for those break ups, but why consider the chance?
There are other things to watch for with regards to wedding rings. Too loose and that could imply a spouse might stray from the relationship bed because they might forget the complete meaning of their wedding ceremony vows. Too tight could curse the couple to a marriage filled with arguments and fights bringing out the worst in a single or both people. Wearing the band on the left hand is considered very all the best. That tradition dates back centuries to when most work was finished with the right hand making it appear more aged or dirty than the left. A plain strap is good luck in comparison to a decorated one in some societies highly, while a ring with religious or cultural icons onto it is considered very lucky in nations with folks from a Celtic background.
We cannot say that anyone i understand has ever split up over a decorated or basic wedding ring, but lots of have had major disagreements over the cost and design of wedding bands which may expose too little character for the bride-to-be, the groom, or both. The largest superstition surrounding a marriage ring consists of dropping it. Superstition says a bride-to-be or groom who drops a wedding ring during the ceremony would be the 1st to die. This is said to be nearly guaranteed if the ring rolls to a stop on a memorial or remembrance rock in the church or chapel. Wow! Take care not to drop the ring.
The Flowers
Tradition says that the best choice of bouquets for the wedding bouquet are either orange blossoms or roses. Orange blossoms are said to represent fertility and chastity, while roses are a symbol of true love. Additionally it is considered good luck for members of the wedding party to put on garlands. This is an extremely old tradition, but one which has been making a comeback in the last several decades. If the bride-to-be tosses her bouquet in fact it is dropped, the bad luck is not on the bride, but on the individual who didn't catch it; so no worries there. It is regarded as good luck to capture the bouquet even if that will not lead to the person catching it being the next to marry. No poor or good stories to share here, but fresh blooms do often help to make the wedding and/or reception photos all the more precious when the marriage album is complete. Beware of the presence of wilted flowers which are considered bad luck extremely.
The Marriage Cake and Reception
There are various traditions involving wedding cakes. One of the most well-known has been that when a couple agrees to place a statuette of the bride-to-be and among the groom on the cake these ought to be of equal height. This is thought to represent equality in a marriage. However, more often than not, people these full days choose not to consist of likenesses of the groom and bride on their wedding cake. Instead, many are choosing eatable representations of their favorite flowers on the cake presented in various styles and occur all types of positions. Another popular pattern is for the marriage cake to include the favourite flavors of the bride, while a separate cake is prepared called the Groom's Cake which is made to please his taste buds.
It is considered misfortune for anyone except the bride or groom to be the first visitors to taste the marriage cake. THEREFORE I guess the custom of getting a piece of cake shoved into your face will continue for some time to come. The bride-to-be usually does that to the groom first, some grooms reciprocate then. Others dread the wrath of ruining that costly make up job that most brides have professionally used shortly before most weddings. On multi-tier cakes it is considered very good luck to save the very best tier, freeze it and eat it about three months later on or after all the wedding photos have already been entered into the wedding album. Most couples serve the remainder of the cake to a little circle of friends and family who end by to view the completed wedding photo album.
Many brides prefer to include special charms to their bridal wedding or shower cake. This long-standing tradition brings good luck and normally includes gold or silver charms in the designs of hearts, clover, horseshoes, wedding ceremony bells, baby money or carriages purses donated by wedding shower attendees or wedding party members. Sometime in the 1980s it became a new tradition to include one or more French-style Cream Puff Trees (croquembouche) in the wedding shower and wedding ceremony reception among with the cake. This amazing creation is constructed of many specific cream puffs protected in caramel and presented in the form of a tree. Guests may use a little spoon or fork to remove as much cream puffs as they care to consume and place them on small plates.
Some couples choose to have their wedding cake divided up carefully and plated by serving personnel out of view of the marriage guests following the cake is demonstrated to everyone and the bride and groom take the first piece or pieces. That is a popular way to make sure the cake is cautiously and equally divided. However, the bride and groom should always be certain that the first piece or pieces of cake are slice with a silver cake knife and silver server. Those first pieces should be placed on great china and eaten with silver or top quality forks. That is considered good luck. Having been to numerous wedding receptions, I can tell you that nothing says cheap and nasty like a couple who choose to cut their cake with a normal kitchen knife and serve it with a pie server. The only thing worse is slopping those 1st bits of cake on to paper plates. Once the bride and groom are served, cake should be offered to guests on ceramic plates.
Avoid cracked or damaged plates. The existence of cracked or nicked plates is considered bad luck for the bride extremely, groom and wedding guests. I have never personally seen this (or, I will say I am personally unaware of it), but some of my older family members claim that just about anything bad that happens during or after the reception is due to the improper demonstration of the marriage cake and other food items. I have heard of from fist fights to auto accidents and missed flights blamed on poor or improper presentation of the cake and meals through the wedding reception. Even poor toasts are unlucky and usually the reason for spats and fights incredibly, so never hands a microphone to someone you know will say something improper or stupid.
The Wedding Vows
People who write their own wedding ceremony vows may think this is actually the best way expressing their love, but wait! A newer wedding tradition says that composing your own vows isn't the best of ideas and may imply disaster to a recently married couple. This is probably due to all the hippie marriages that took place in the sixties and seventies. People used pet names for each other and authored often long, convoluted and embarrassing vows that produced no sense to anyone at the ceremony and occasionally had nothing to do with the couple's promises to each other. I sat through among those types of weddings and wished I had not. Nobody knew what the few was discussing and they even appeared to confuse each additional. That is why people should never do drugs. The couple I spoke of broke up within two years and now hate one another.
A long-standing tradition says that wedding ceremony vows should be set by the minister. A more recent tradition states that it is all the best for the vows to end up being compiled by the bridesmaid for the bride and best guy for the groom when the minister suggests the couple provide their personal vows. Superstition says that parents should keep calm through the ceremony accept for events when a parent is asked if he or she gives their child apart to marry. Having a stand set for the bride's dad is considered bad luck. I understand of at least two wedding ceremonies where both parents refused to attend and both marriages later on finished in divorce. I am certain there were other notable causes for those break ups, but why consider the chance?
The Parent's Blessing
Finally, it is very all the best for the groom to be given the blessing of the bride's parents or parent. This dates back to Biblical custom and teaching, and also happens to be a tradition that I believe is essential for a long and happy marriage. That is just my opinion. I guess I've just seen way too many couples torn apart by family influences and interference because somebody got something against the groom (or the bride for example) to start with and that remained a matter of contention until it triggered an eventual break up and divorce. Only the strongest of couples can stand up to that type or sort of pressure, so I do not recommend ignoring this tradition. If worse involves worse try to can get on the nice side of the family of the bride or groom well before you announce an engagement or date for your wedding.